Ode to Life's Obstacles

Try to love everything that is in your way. Even the old man shuffling last night through the airport.

I tried to pass him as he pulled at his cumbersome bags and tugged at his crumpled clothes, walking through the busy aisles. Then I took a deep breath, surrendered, and studied his awkward movements with awe and appreciation.

Try to love everything that is in your way. Even my fear of failure and my fear of not being good enough.

In the past, these fears wrapped me in a straitjacket of indecision and gave me the illusion of safety — because, “Hey, if I don’t try, then I won’t fail, right?” But now these fears trickle into my awareness like half-baked ghosts from my past, trying to haunt me back into old and familiar hiding places. Mostly, these days, I don’t heed their call. I can see these ghosts for what they really are — allies conspiring to keep me safe. Thank you, old friends. Your services are no longer required.

Try to love everything that is in your way. Even if it hurts, bites, lashes out, or forces you onto another path.

There is wisdom in these obstacles — which can take the form of a challenging relationship, a harsh comment, traffic, unexpected job loss, stubbing your toe, or something simply not going your way. What if, instead of cursing these obstacles and falling victim to their wily ways, we blessed them? What if we took the time to kiss their toes, leaving flowers and incense burning at their feet? What if we knew that an obstacle is not really an obstacle at all — but an unexpected and inconvenient gift that detours us, opens us, and stretches us into areas or experiences we would not have previously chosen?

Try to love everything that is in your way. And sometimes we can’t.

Sometimes the most self-loving thing is to say, “No. Never again.” Sometimes the wisest thing is to spin on our heels, turn around, and walk away, never looking back. Having faced these obstacles, our residual anger is sometimes so big that when we finally learn to forgive, we know we will never forget. And we grow all the wiser for it — cultivating self-love and developing a discerning eye for obstacles that are not worth our time or energy.

Try to love everything that is in your way.

And hold a prayer that Life has in store for us just enough flow and ease that our confidence continues to grow and our hearts courageously begin to melt. And hold a prayer that Life has in store for us just enough obstacles, sprinkled in like cinnamon on toast, that we grow and stretch in all the right places — in all the most unexpected and nourishing ways.

That is my prayer.